Made the mistake of telling my neighbor that I'm trying to (humanely!) get rid of the groundhog living under my porch, and he gave me a pained look and said "my wife named him Gilbert," so... I guess Gilbert now lives under my porch forever.
I'm in a similar situation with a field mouse living in my flower pots. Except, in our scenario, I am your neighbors wife, and you would be my husband. 🤷♀️
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