2813 Followers
343 Following
Humor/Satire at McSweeney's, LA Times, Boston Globe
Austin, Texas
The horror
Undesirables from seedy underground locations making lots of noise at night (cicadas)
How much an ice cream vendor on the Mall tries to charge you for one chocolate ice cream before you explain you aren’t a tourist
Preferring Rehoboth over Bethany
“President Donald Trump said on Monday he was deploying 800 National Guard troops to Washington and temporarily taking over the city’s police depar...
Hehehe my work here is done
I smell a McS premise
College!! 😭
This is my neighborhood Target that I'm at all the time with my kids. I can't wrap my head around it.
I will never write the great American novel, but I did write the phrase "pelvis chickens" and that is enough for me. @mcsweeneys.net
"Perimenopause is triggered when your ovaries—or 'pelvis chickens'—quit dependably laying eggs each month. Maybe some months they lay eggs, but other months they just sit on the couch, drinking a nice Malbec, eating corn nuts, and watching Better Call Saul."
Thank you for calling the perimenopause hotline. Our phone lines are flooded with an unexpected gush of calls right now, but we assure you that our...
The Austin Target shooting was at my Target. Minutes from my home, I'm there with my kids all the time. I know the people who work there. I'm shook. When is enough enough with the guns?
I'll put on my flannel onsie with a butt flap!
Wise words, wise words
@mcsweeneys.net is serving us the surreal humor of @miriamjayaratna.bsky.social that we need. Also, I'm buying a king bed tomorrow.🛏
"My life partner tosses, turns, and loudly attempts to learn Mandarin on Duolingo. None of these activities requires me to relocate to the couch, which is good, because we no longer have a couch. There’s no room for any furniture in our apartment except the bed."
My husband and I gaze at each other while we brush our teeth, savoring these final moments together before we go our separate ways. I kiss him good...
