The Tesla Diner is a perfect metaphor for the whole Tesla brand: a bad facsimile of something that already exists, made by people who don't understand what they're recreating, with a thin veneer of superficial futurism on top, for people with no taste or self-respect

www.nytimes.com/2025/08/05/d...

Tesla engineers built a proprietary tool to flatten patties for the smash burgers with crisp browned edges, held together with caramelized onions and cheese, which seemed to be on most tables. It lent the dish a superficial whiff of innovation, but the burger didn’t stand out in any meaningful way.
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They must have been fighting over the hamburger-smasher assignment over at Tesla HQ. Dead simple, scores you all kinds of points with the coked-out fool momentarily obsessed with running a fake diner, and it doesn't even kill anyone. What a sweet gig!

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